To sever ties, or wait

This is the first good day I've had in a while - no one to deal with but me, and this time, I actually enjoyed myself. I hope this will last into the rest of the weekend.

I don't know how long it will take for me to recover, and whether it is still possible for me to undo the consequences of some of my decisions. All I know is, I do not feel as trapped as before. I know how volatile my state of mind can be, but I think I can delay (and hopefully prevent) the onset of uncalled-for depression by just shoving evil thoughts away before they take hold. The best way to do that is to focus on other things, and another set of obstacles. But perhaps it will take the same skills to manage both. I need to learn how to act quickly, and not to obsess. I need to hold fast to the present and give it form and reality, because no one else will do it for me, and because it is the only thing that's worth doing.

I still haven't made up my mind, but I know that I have to decide soon. Whatever I choose, the important thing is that I do not betray myself. Let's see what happens.