Idiots

The 'Survivor All-Stars' are dumb-asses. Well, not in everything, of course. But in one very big thing that I could not believe they screwed up on.



I just watched the first two episodes tonight. I thought they would be more competitive. And they were, in a way. Too bad they just revealed how stupid they were as well.



Each 'tribe' was given very few resources after being 'abandoned' in yet another tropical island: a machete, a pot/bucket, and a map to a water reserve, which turned out to be contaminated (the water was cloudy) which meant it had to be boiled to prevent the possibility of being infected with some disease and possibly having to go home and weaken the tribe. Valid point. So they had to figure out how to make fire. Big problem there. None of the geniuses knew how (couldn't they at least have figured that out when they decided to play the game for the second time?). And that was basically the story of the first episode and part of the second. How the 'Survivors' attempted and spectacularly failed to produce fire. In the need for water. Which they had but could not use. Imagine the angst.



Let me emphasize here the fact that there were eighteen of them divided into three 'tribes'. All of them faced with the same predicament. And none of them figured out the obvious solution that was just hanging above their heads. Coconuts. Duh. They needed to hydrate themselves. Coconuts were in abundance around them. They had a machete to cut them with. How could they not have seen it?



It wouldn't have annoyed me so much if I hadn't seen one of them actually cut up a coconut and do nothing with it. I think she just poured the liquid from the coconuts into one of the buckets half filled with the contaminated water from the well. Perfect. She really worked her brain cells there.



There's more to their stupidity. On the night of the first 'tribal council', it rained. Hard. I remember thinking, Poor tribe being forced to vote someone off. They won't have the chance to collect fresh water from the rain. Because by the time they got done it wasn't raining so hard anymore. Apparently, they didn't lose out to the others at all. Because none of the other teams had the same brilliant idea that I got.



And later, they kept on harping about how much they needed water and made it their major angst-of-the-episode. When it rained again in the morning and they were already really, really thirsty, some of the guys suddenly thought, Oh, we can get water from the rain! Imagine that. And so they held their tongues out and slurped up rain water as it fell from leaves or collected it into their palms. Brilliant.



I hope the 'Survivors' don't show the same degree of stupidity as they did in the first two. That would be just sad. Seriously though, I think the 'voting-off' portion of the game has really changed with the reduction of the number of tribe members from eight to six. It becomes easier for a single person or an alliance of two to manipulate the results, and swing votes are easier to spot.



If I have the time I might just want to see succeeding episodes of this new series. I am itching to see Richard-the-big-fat-naked-gay-guy-and-former-winner-who-doesn't-deserve-to-win-again get voted off. Yes, that will just be perfect. But knowing the players, well, they just might let him win again. They are idiots like that.